I may stop blogging on this because I think I'm the only one who actually reads it and checks in. Truthfully, it's good to get things off of my chest, but if no one is reading those things - why continue? Oh well, maybe a few more.
I miss Matthew Dennis Graham. I've been getting flashes of how he looked when he was laying helpless in the hospital and of how he coughed and choked on the trach the last time I saw him. I can still feel his cold skin as we played thumb wars for the last time - him winning even though he was in such incredible pain. I see him laying there on that hospital cot and laugh when I think of him flicking me off just so I could see Matthew shine through the being that lay before me. I still remember every call I recieved from my parents and how I felt after every one - my heart stopped and my body stilled and I choked on every breath. These feelings will never go away and it kills me that these are the last moments I had with my brother.
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4 comments:
I check your blog every time I check my livejournal's friendlist. But I could never leave a comment without sounding like a stalker or something... until now. :)
To blog. You definately need to keep writing on here i'm sure many people read this, and if they don't they should. I check all the time and it makes me think about whats important in life instead of small things that don't matter. Your a great writer and I'd like to see you continue.
please keep blogging, your words are incredible and are really life changing.
I don't always (or ever) have anything constructive to say, but I do enjoy your writings.
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